just keep smoking……

ChantixPrescription pill commercials crack me up.  I recently saw a Chantix commercial and immediately fell in love with its side effects.

I actually feel sympathy for smokers:

If you, your family, or caregiver notice agitation, hostility, depression, or changes in behavior, thinking, or mood that are not typical for you, or you develop suicidal thoughts or actions, anxiety, panic, aggression, anger, mania, abnormal sensations, hallucinations, paranoia, or confusion, stop taking CHANTIX and call your doctor right away.

Some people can have serious skin reactions while taking CHANTIX, some of which can become life-threatening. These can include rash, swelling, redness, and peeling of the skin.

Hmmmmm.  Smoke a cigarette or take a pill that could make your skin peel?

You might as well just keep smoking.

Wow, big Pharma really is adept at wrapping its tentacles around America’s throat and will never let go.

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Rednecks Don’t Need Spell Check

(I’m not sure why, but this post gets the most views of anything I’ve written.  Apparently, rednecks are polarizing.)

“No one has anythang agenst rednecks” Chris from Independence High

 

(I used to run a website where I made fun of people who posted stupid shit on Facebook.  This was one of my posts about rednecks.)

One group of people who always help me feel intelligent is “Rednecks.”

I absolutely love the fact that they jack off on their bibles, wear camouflage, hate all non-white people, hate northerners for no reason, use the word nigger, hate gay people, fuck their sisters/cousins/aunts/uncles, go mudding, hunt anything with a pulse and bitch and complain all the time about Hispanics taking their jobs.

Rednecks are the best.  Society always needs a continuous stream of racist, sister fuckers with non-chlorinated gene pools to keep the white race alive.  Sometimes, I am so proud to be white (sarcasm).

Please do not get confused between “Rednecks” and “Country People”.   There are actually many good country folk out there and those are not the people I am speaking about here.

But, for the love of God, Allah, Buddha and Krishna, WHY CAN’T REDNECKS USE SPELL CHECK???  I just do not get it.  The following posts are from Redneck Groups on Facebook.  Just read and enjoy.   And remember, this is real; I could not make this shit up. Continue reading

Strip Club Babysitter- the White Trash Chronicles

I’m going to start this new series where I occasionally comment on real news stories involving anything “white-trash” related.  These stories will all lend credibility to my belief that America should institute a “mandatory sterilization” policy for all people who should not be allowed to breed.

For example; Casey Anthony, all of the Kardashians, Lil’Wayne, all white supremacists, the Osmonds, Rush Limbaugh, etc.

The stories speak for themselves.

Chapter I. Strip Club Babysitter

A couple left their 4 year-old child in their car for an hour while they went into a Florida strip club.  Now, although the parents appear to be of Hispanic descent, this is definitely an act taken directly from the “white trash handbook of life.”

Please remember, I’m using the term “handbook” very loosely here.  It’s more like life directions whittled into the wood steps of their trailers.

By the way, it was about 88 degrees that day and probably over 100 inside a car.

But, if these parents truly followed white trash laws, they would have left the window cracked and given their child a few Red Bulls, pixie sticks and a cigarette to play with.  No lighter though, they wouldn’t want their kid to set the family Datsun on fire.

How about this?

Dad– open your legs and now we take your balls.

Mom– put your feet in the stirrups and get ready to have your uterus harvested.

There is no reason in the world why these two should ever be allowed to breed again.  Go ahead, try to tell me I’m wrong here.

The Skittles Caper (Trayvon Martin)

As you may know, I live in Florida so that means I am inundated daily by the media about the Trayvon Martin, George Zimmerman case.

Well, after some evidence was released today, I now have some theories.

The “Evidence” (I use the term in quotations because who really knows what is real in this case): Pictures were released of Zimmerman showing cuts on the back of his head and on his nose.

A convenience store surveillance camera shows Martin, in his hoody, purchasing a bag of Skittles.  The store employee didn’t appear to be scared of the terrifying black kid in a hoody (sarcasm), in fact, he took his money and gave him some change.

And apparently, the autopsy showed that there was marijuana in Martin’s bloodstream.

The Marijuana Defense: While THC was found to be in Martin’s bloodstream, they exact time when he smoked some weed can’t be determined by any test.

This brings us to quite the dilemma:  Continue reading