Dear Kyle (the troll pit-bull owner)

whitetrashSadly, my posts about pit-bull owners seem to attract the most attention.  After reading my post; Pit Bulls, White Trash & Ghetto Fabulous A-holes, an incredibly angry pit-bull owner named Kyle sent me the following comment:

“The jackass that made this blog needs dog bit. I own a pit and have bred dozens of small breeds for years. Bit atleast a dozen times and it was stupid yuppie people with furr ball house dogs. Your stats may be close to right but you can’t blame it on the breed. Guarantee small furry dogs bite ten times more than pits but it’s never recorded. Wonder why??? Jackass’s like you”

Thank you Kyle for supporting just about everything in my post that relates to DUMB-ASS Pit-Bull owners.  Essentially, your quote is nonsense.  I do want to thank you for letting me know that I “needs dog bit.”

So how long did it take to pass the high school equivalency exam?  It probably sucked that the test proctors wouldn’t let you bring your seeing-eye Pit-Bull into the exam with you.  Discrimination is terrible.  You must fully understand now how Rosa Parks felt. Continue reading

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Mad, Dumb-Ass Pit Bull Defender (Hilarious)

Well, a while ago, I wrote a post about Pit Bulls and how I get tired of hearing people defending them.  Pit Bulls, White Trash & Ghetto Fabulous A-Holes

I thought it may get some negative feedback and below are the comments from a Pit Bull lover and my replies:

June: “Your so fucking stupid! Go look up what breeds of dogs have the most attacks per year! I have 3 pit bulls and a 3 yr old and 3 month old baby! U make me sick! I trust my pit bulls! Can’t trust my blue heeler with my children or other animals at all.. now answer this TRUTHFULLY! HAVE YOU EVER EVEN MET A PIT BULL?! HAVE YOU BEEN ATTACKED? HAVE YOU EVER BEEN BITTEN BY A DOG?! AND WHAT FUCKING BREED WAS IT?!” Continue reading

Pit Bulls, White Trash & Ghetto Fabulous A-holes

(I’m reposting this because it was one of my most popular posts)

I have always loved animals, especially dogs.  I grew up with pet boxers and love them to this day.  Currently, I don’t have any pets because of allergies and laziness; I like to be able to leave my home without worrying about taking care of animals.

I grow increasingly tired of listening to people trying to defend why Pit Bulls are gentle and non-dangerous.  Here are my thoughts:

  • Pit Bulls were originally bred as “catch-dogs” to hunt down wild cattle and wild hogs
  • Their jaws are ridiculously strong
  • Ghetto fabulous assholes have used Pit Bulls as fighting dogs to make money for years (insert Michael Vick jokes here)
  • Drug dealers, of all races, use Pit Bulls to protect their stash houses
  • Rednecks use Pit Bulls to hunt hogs and to make themselves feel tougher
  • White Trash use Pit Bulls to protect their trailers and to accompany their exotic snake collections
  • Men with small dicks have Pit Bulls because they can’t afford Corvettes

You know, Pit Bulls are beautiful dogs, but they will always be incredibly dangerous.  Even if one is raised correctly, they can still be deadly.

There is a reason why you don’t hear about Golden Retrievers mutilating humans; they just don’t have the temperament or jaw strength that a Pit Bull has.

Hey White Trash, thanks for having a Pit Bull near your little daughter, well done asshole. Poor kid.

Here’s the huge difference: if a Retriever bites you it will probably draw some blood and you may need a Band-Aid.  If a Pit Bull bites you, depending upon your age and size, you will need stitches and you may die.

So, as long as America has Dumb Rednecks, Ghetto Fabulous Assholes, White Trash and men with small dicks; Pit Bulls will always be dangerous.

Tim Tebow, God & Dumb America

Tim Tebow passed for 316 yards in an improbable victory against the Pittsburgh Steelers in the playoffs this year.

Religious America went crazy, nutso, speaking in tongues, slapping their Bibles against the pews jubilation for the professed virgin as he knelt, prayed and thanked god for his team’s victory.

Facebook pages buzzed with talk of the 3:16 victory. That’s right, 3:16, like the Bible verse. Apparently god watches football and listen to football players’ prayers. Forget all the starving children in the country, America needs touchdowns. Continue reading