Trump, the bad Ex strikes again

tumblr_inline_nzrlbglXpe1qf8pbv_500Wow, wow, wow.  Even with a Republican majority in the House, they still couldn’t present a passable healthcare bill to replace Obamacare.

Our President, the self proclaimed Great Negotiator, couldn’t get a deal done.  Surely, he will take some responsibility for this……………. uh, no.

That’s because he’s never actually been a great deal maker or negotiator of any kind.  He’s just a billionaire who boss-hogs his way through every deal he’s ever made others do.  Billionaires don’t negotiate, they tell the other side exactly what to do.   And then the other side with less money and less power gives in.

“We had no Democrat support. We had no votes from the Democrats. They weren’t going to give us a single vote, so it’s a very difficult thing to do,” said our fearless leader.

This is truly amazing.  Even in times of total control, the Republican party is fractured and a terrible mess.  Hell, they only had about six years to create a good plan.  Oops.  Damn Democrats getting in the way again (sarcasm).

So, the terrible Ex strikes again. Trump blames is inadequacies, his failures and his lack of deal making ability on other people.  Exactly how a bad ex would react; BLAME, BLAME, BLAME and BLAME.  It’s never their fault.

This is our President.  This is the leader of the free world.  This is a disgrace.


Donald (an elitist) President

trumpeliteSadly, I’ve always enjoyed how Republicans and Democrats argue with each other.

I’m fascinated with how each side shapes their arguments against the other.

One of the most common criticisms I’ve heard repeated over the years by Republicans of Democrats is, “So tired of the liberal elitists who can’t relate to the common man.”

So, I find it quite interesting that during the entire election and presently, all the disdain for “elitists” has faded into the Right-Wing abyss.

Why is that you may ask?

Shot in the dark here…………..maybe because Trump is an elitist????

Well, he is and that really can’t be argued.

Private boarding school at New York Military Academy, a graduate of Wharton, he took over his family real estate business in 1971………..

That upbringing doesn’t exactly scream of a man with the “calloused” hands of someone who actually touched a shovel or cleaned a toilet once in a while.

This is another example of what cracks me up with American politics and Duh’Merica.  Stop kidding yourself……. the far left and the far right are not two separate groups.

They may be two different types of shit, but they both smell exactly the same.

Dear Chris Christie (letter from a Duh’Merican)


(Thought I would re-post this given the current debacle he’s in.  I actually heard him say that he found out about everything after he finished “working out.”  Yeah right.)

Are you really going to be running for President in 2016?  Are you really going to be the face of the Republican Party?

Well, I guess you are a fairly accurate representation of the American people.  After all, I think it’s being reported that around 36% of all American adults aged 20 and over are considered obese.

Even after your lap-band surgery, you still appear to be almost morbidly obese.  But there is plenty of time for you to “de-supersize” yourself before you make a bid for the presidency.

I’m not sure what it says about a person who has to have a band surgically implanted around their stomach to curb their voracious appetite.  This apparent lack of self control makes me a bit worried about how you may behave yourself if elected President.

Forget about religion and gay marriage, let’s talk about GMO’s and large sodas.  Yippeeee.

Could you imagine the power you would have?  You could have sexy hookers feed you chicken wings while they dancing naked around your own personal “oral”, I mean oval office. Continue reading

Shhhhh……Duh’Merica is sleeping

The pillow is so comfortable; so damn comfortable as you sink into the feathers.  It was a long night of catching up on Honey Boo-Boo episodes, you deserve a rest.

Shhhhh, don’t wake up.  While you count Kardashians jumping over your drool-stained cheeks, America is supplying weapons to a new group of dark-skinned rebels who will one day crash another plane.

The temperature is perfect; so damn perfect with the ceiling fan on full blast.  You pull one leg out from the sheets to remain cool.  After all, the jacuzzi scene on the Bachelor was hot tonight.  All those strangers sucking face.  You would cut your arm off to be the next star.

Shhhhhh, don’t turn over to quickly, you might wake.  While you dream of McRibb sandwiches, America just listened to every one of your phone calls and read all of your text messages because you used the word “B O M B” on Words With Friends.

The birds are starting to chirp as you stretch your arms above your head.  What a good sleep, maybe you should roll back over and get another 30 minutes or another 30 years.  While you decide to hit snooze, America is still trying to convince the world that prayer will make everything better.

Shhhh…. Duh’Merica is sleeping and I’m afraid they will never wake up.


Dear Republican Party

Dear Republican Party,

Well, another election has passed with the exact same losing result.

You have officially become that little white trash kid with the annoying rat-tail.  You cut the rat-tail off, but it grows back every four years with the same tired agenda.

Those opposable thumbs you keep staring at are a true sign of the evolution that you can’t seem to embrace.

I know, I know, evolution isn’t real and that guy with the white beard created us in his own image.

So, I guess that means your god is a fat, white, pasty dude who continues to spit in the face of women, minorities and gay people.

I know, I know, homosexuality is a sin according to the book of Leviticus.   Continue reading

Why the Election Doesn’t Matter (Dear Mouthbreathers)

(The election doesn’t really matter because the mouthbreathers have already won)

Dear Mouthbreathers,

Thanks so much for voting on election day, the rest of us who read books truly appreciate it. (sarcasm)  I do worry though that you may be confused with the ballot. 

After all, it’s a bit more difficult to understand than the Waffle House picture menus you are used to.  Remember, you can’t vote for “covered” or “smothered”, because the major candidates are already consumed with both and you don’t have to choose.

Mouthbreathers for Obama: Thanks for casting your vote solely because his skin is a somewhat darker than the white candidate.  You do realize that he’s a half-white, correct?

You do realize that Obama is Harvard educated and has never even attempted to walk in your ghetto scarred shoes, correct?  You do realize that he’s about as close to ghetto as you are as close to knowing where Harvard is, correct?

Thanks again for casting your vote because you thought he was going to pay your gas bill.

Mouthbreathers for Romney: Wow, you dumb-ass, bible thumping crackers make me want to peel my pale skin from my bones and throw out all my Mountain Dew.

NEWSFLASH- He’s a fucking Mormon.  That’s right, magical-fucking-underwear.  Wow, well done religious right.  Continue reading

The Power of Color

It’s amazing how skin color can make people throw their belief systems into the garbage and totally forget what they stand for.

Homosexual Marriage: Unless you live under a rock, you probably heard that President Obama publically stated that he supports the right for homosexuals to marry.

Well done Pres, that’s common fucking sense and I didn’t realize that he’s the first President to actually support this out loud.  Damn, I guess I let my faith in mankind slip quite a bit there.

This really didn’t seem like a big deal to me until I watched an interview with pastor Dr. Kenneth Samuel regarding his support of Obama.

Samuel is the senior pastor of Victory for the World Church and sees Obama’s endorsement of gay marriage as the right thing for the country.

He called his church’s backing of the president “righteous” even if it means losing revenue and members after community television station WATC dropped the church’s weekly broadcast.

HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE- do you mean to tell me that the leader of a major black church in the United States is backing the President’s position on gay marriage?????

How can that be?  How is this even possible? Continue reading