People ‘Round Here

religious-fanaticI recently commented on a blog post about god’s will and received a very pointed reply comment from a believer.

You can visit the blog post here if you would like: Not So Polite Dinner Conversation-A Christian commenter comes slinking back, and a question; why believe one and not the others?    

I enjoyed the post whether it was a true story or an invented one.  I like how it was presented and the discussion it created.  I had to stop commenting because I didn’t want to troll.

The comments reminded me about my time in college.  I attended a small, private Baptist college in North West Georgia.

Growing up in Florida, my college life was a huge culture shock for me.  But I wouldn’t trade that experience for anything.  It helped me grow as a person and see life from several different perspectives.

I attended school during the late 1990’s, but it felt more like the 1940’s.  The town was extremely religious and very, very white.

The people in my college town were mostly Southern Baptist and very close-minded.  Although the town had two colleges, a large segment of the population was largely uneducated and very simple-minded.

While out in public, it was not uncommon to hear people throwing around racial epithets like “nigger,” “spic,” “wetback,” etc in normal conversations. It was also not uncommon to watch people in public berate those who may have appeared homosexual.  This was very normal and accepted there. Continue reading

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Bacon Jerky = Duck Dynasty Irony

baconLeviticus 11:7-11:8“And the swine, though he divide the hoof, and be clovenfooted, yet he cheweth not the cud; he [is] unclean to you.  Of their flesh shall ye not eat, and their carcase shall ye not touch, they [are] unclean to you.”

Oh shit, what to do now Duck Dynasty?  It’s ok to hate gay people due to Leviticus, but it’s ok to go against the bible and profit from the swine???

Oh, I get it.  Bacon, ribs and pulled-pork tastes good so that’s ok.  But gay people, that’s just some crazy shit you aren’t comfortable with so go ahead and use your bible to justify your hatred.

Hey Duh’Merica, wake the fuck up and realize you are being duped by this rich family of “reality” stars.  Their bank accounts swell under the guise of a god-loving family while they use the bible to support their bigotry.

And all the while, the hypocrisy flies over your head.

Keep praying and don’t think.  Rinse and repeat.

 

 

duck dynasty rednecks (duh’merica rises again)

Duck Dynasty stars 660 APThanks a lot Duck Dynasty for bringing Leviticus back.  I’m still amazed that people are shocked that a Christian redneck made some disparaging comments about gay people.

I’m even more amazed that so many people care about some bearded rednecks who wear a lot of camo and make duck shit.

I’m the first person to defend a person’s right of free speech.  But what I think is important is to examine exactly what inspired his comments. 

Without much investigation, I think it’s safe to say that the Duck Father has a problem with homosexuals because of his Christian faith and fervent belief in the book of Leviticus.

“If a man has sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable.  They are to be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads.” Leviticus 20:13 (NIV)

Isn’t it about time that people understand that there is some crazy shit in the bible, some especially crazy shit in the old testament?

Here’s another verse from the same book:

“Your male and female slaves are to come from the nations around you; from them you may buys slaves.” Leviticus 25:44 (NIV)

Why is it that so many Christians point to one verse of the bible to justify their bigotry against gay people and then forget about all the other verses concerning  things like slavery, like female submission, etc. Continue reading

god’s mysterious ways(the devil wins again)

God-Must-Love-Stupid-People_6160-l

I’ve grown so tired of hearing the expression “god works in mysterious ways.” (I never capitalize god, just doesn’t feel right)

Hey god, your mysterious ways confuse me:

….kids dying from cancer

….the kardashians, jean shorts, ebonics

….kids starving throughout the entire world

….tyler perry, duck dynasty, rhianna, mtv

….children being sexually abused, women being raped, female circumcision

….the bible, rednecks, confederate flags, prayers

Holy Shit god- Looks like the DEVIL is kicking your ass and the score is about a trillion to zero.

(I have no problem with people believing in god, but if you are going to believe in god, at least believe that he is indeed a cruel fucking god)

 

MTV, Miley and Duh’Merica (the end is near)

Miley-Cyrus-performance-at-MTV-VMA-2013-2223057So the internet blew up the other day because of Miley Cyrus and her performance at the VMA awards and I’m left incredibly confused.

I watched her “performance” and I had difficulty finding anything artistic about it.  She can’t sing and she can’t dance.  Her tongue was hanging out of her mouth like a dog who has been wandering the desert for 10 years without water.

She appeared to me to be a lost soul doing everything she could to “shock” people.  And sadly, it worked.

Twitter nearly exploded as millions of thumbs tweeted and typed “OMG’s” about Miley’s ass shaking.  Each time she touched Robin Thicke’s dick with that foam finger, I wondered what good ole’ Billy Ray would have thought.

I think Billy Ray’s heart is definitely aching and breaking right now.  Could you imagine just losing your wife because she fucked Brett Michaels and then watching your daughter attempt to be a porn star on national television? Continue reading

Hey Baptist

(Author’s note; I’m rather enjoying writing in this style, kind of like a letter to people who piss me off.  It makes me feel like someone is actually listening.  I graduated from a small, private Baptist college in Rome, Georgia, hence the inspiration.  It was the most racist, backwoods, redneck filled city I’ve ever lived in.)

Hey Baptist– Stop telling me not to drink beer while you fill your obese face with only deep-fried foods while washing it down with gallons of sweet tea and Mountain Dew.

A vegetable is no longer a vegetable once you bread it with flour, deep fry it and dip it in Ranch Dressing.

Hey Baptist– Stop telling me that I’m going to hell for having premarital sex while you secretly Google search “Filipino Lady-Boys Ball-Gag Naked Twister”.

I know that your wife is constantly busy folding your laundry, buttering your toast, ironing your suspenders and picking up your Twinkie wrappers and probably is too tired to let you go balls deep inside her each night. Continue reading

The Great Bill Hicks and Christianity

The Great Bill Hicks talking about Christians


Absolutely brilliant.  If I could resurrect one person in this world, it would be Bill.

Cheers