Trump’s new Pledge of Allegiance

“I pledge allegiance, to the flag, of the disjointed States of Tump’Merica.  And to the Republic, for which it stands, One Nation, under Russia, with liberty for the privileged and justice for those with white skin.”

pencetrumpOur Dear Leader has proposed the above changes to the Pledge of Allegiance.  The Republican Congress should have no problem passing it.

Sadly though, it was reported that Mike Pence was furious because he wanted to have the word “God” added 150 times regardless of making any sense. (this is not actual news, this is hyperbole, comedy, etc.)

As ridiculous as this sounds, I wouldn’t surprised if some version of this happened one day.  Because this is the current state of Duh’Merica.

We are spinning wildly in a society without logic, without reason and without intelligent thought.  Anger and emotions have taken center stage.  Logic is just an afterthought.

We are Duh’Merica and we deserve this.

(By the way, I am a white man, I’ve never supported Hillary and I’m no bleeding heart.)

 

 

the Redneck Parade (when Trump returns)

horsetrumpWhen Trump returns from his first global visit (the greatest presidential global visit in the history of America): there will be a parade to celebrate.  Not just any parade, the greatest parade ever………… the greatest parade in the history of ever.

Trump, our dear leader, will ride in on a gigantic white stallion (of course it will be white).  The stallion’s name will be “Nationalism.”  Our Dear Leader will ride Nationalism without a saddle, because he’s a stud like that.

It has nothing to do with ironic symbolism. (That symbolism being the absence of stability within this administration).

Our Dear Leader will be riding Nationalism extremely erect with his usual victorious smile and brandishing two gigantic, gold six shooters.  The bullets will streak into the air with smoke signal slogans of ; Muslim Ban, Jail Hillary, Fuck the FBI, Fake News, No Russian Collusion, etc.

While watching the bullet smoke signals, the angry white Rednecks will applaud loudly; even though they have trouble reading and continually become distracted by their opposable thumbs.

But what they do know is that whatever their Dear Leader says is ABSOLUTELY FUCKING TRUE.  They continue to applaud and applaud and applaud and applaud until they need a Mountain Dew refill, only then does the crowd quiet.

Unfortunately, Our Dear Leader realized the power of the Redneck Vote.  They are so easily fooled, so easily influenced, so easily agitated.  It only took a few truly fake news stories and an agenda of hate to win their votes.  And their votes were many.

Every night I look to the sky and cry; pleading with the aliens to come take me to their home.  Far, far away from this planet.

sexual harassment isn’t real

Of course our Dear Leader Donald Trump is going to support his butt-buddy Bill O’Reilly regarding sexual harassment settlements.  I mean why the hell not?  Fox has only settled five suits brought against Billy boy.

Trump said to the New York Times: I think he’s a person I know well — he is a good person,” Trump said, according to the Times. “I think he shouldn’t have settled; personally I think he shouldn’t have settled. Because you should have taken it all the way. I don’t think Bill did anything wrong.

It’s always refreshing when the leader of the free world comments about media personalities and their sex suits.

billtrump

GOOD, FUCKING, LORD.

This is our Oval office.  This is our Dear Leader.

But then again, he did talk about grabbing women by the pussy.  So what should we expect?

I truly wonder if our Dear Leader understands what sexual harassment really is.  Maybe he thinks grabbing pussy is similar to how he “negotiates.”

When you are a billionaire you don’t have to negotiate.  You boss-hog your way through life and tell the other party exactly what you are going to do.  They can either take it or leave it.

We should all be embarrassed.  We should all be saddened by this.

Is our Dear Leader privy to some information that would exonerate his buddy?  No, probably not.  He just “knows” him and “knows” he wouldn’t do something like that.

Or, Billy Balls has video of our Dear Leader grabbing a lot of pussy.  That’s probably more plausible.

(I do feel sorry for all women and men who have been sexually harassed or abused in any way.  It’s a sad commentary on our society when people like Trump/O’Reilly devalue a very serious issue.) 

Trump, the bad Ex strikes again

tumblr_inline_nzrlbglXpe1qf8pbv_500Wow, wow, wow.  Even with a Republican majority in the House, they still couldn’t present a passable healthcare bill to replace Obamacare.

Our President, the self proclaimed Great Negotiator, couldn’t get a deal done.  Surely, he will take some responsibility for this……………. uh, no.

That’s because he’s never actually been a great deal maker or negotiator of any kind.  He’s just a billionaire who boss-hogs his way through every deal he’s ever made others do.  Billionaires don’t negotiate, they tell the other side exactly what to do.   And then the other side with less money and less power gives in.

“We had no Democrat support. We had no votes from the Democrats. They weren’t going to give us a single vote, so it’s a very difficult thing to do,” said our fearless leader.

This is truly amazing.  Even in times of total control, the Republican party is fractured and a terrible mess.  Hell, they only had about six years to create a good plan.  Oops.  Damn Democrats getting in the way again (sarcasm).

So, the terrible Ex strikes again. Trump blames is inadequacies, his failures and his lack of deal making ability on other people.  Exactly how a bad ex would react; BLAME, BLAME, BLAME and BLAME.  It’s never their fault.

This is our President.  This is the leader of the free world.  This is a disgrace.

this is our president (tucker vs trump)

(The source for this below post is Brad Jaffy @BraddJaffy on Twitter)

carlson-trumpPolitically speaking, I consider myself more in the center and at times maybe a bit left of center.  So generally I am not a fan of Fox News.

But, I will say that I sometimes do enjoy Tucker Carlson.  I first started listening to him on a the Bubba the Love Sponge Show out of Tampa, FL.

I feel like Carlson can be very fair, even though he works for Fox News.  He should be commended for that.

Carlson interviewed Trump last night and asked some good questions about wiretapping and Trump’s tweeting habits.

Carlson: you tweet, the former administration wiretapped me, surveilled me, at Trump Tower during the last election.  How did you find out?  You said, I just found out.  How did you learn that?

Trump: Well, I’ve been reading about things.  I read in, I think it was January 20 a “New York Times” article where they were talking about wiretapping.  There was an article, I think they used the exact term.  I read other things.  I watched your friend Bret Baier the day previous where he was talking about certain very complex sets of things happening, and wiretapping.  I said, wait a minute, there’s a lot of wiretapping being talked about.  I’ve been seeing a lot of things.  Now, for the most part, I’m not going to discuss it, because we have it before the committee and we will be submitting things before the committee very soon that hasn’t been submitted as of yet.  But it’s potentially a very serious situation.

Carlson later asked Trump: Why not wait to tweet about it until you can prove it?  Don’t you devalue your words when you can’t provide evidence?

Trump replied: Well, because “The New York Times” wrote about it.  Not that I respect “The New York Times”.  I call it the failing “New York Times”.  But they did write on January 20 using the word wiretap.

Regardless of what you believe or the politicians you support, you should all have a major problem with interactions like this from our President.

Holy shit, this is our President.  This is the so-called “leader” of the free world.  Trump based a very dangerous allegation against a previous president because Trump’s “been reading about things.”

Holy….. fucking……shit.

Hey Duh’Merica, keep believing that everything negative said or reported about Trump is a lie.  Keep believing that everything negative about Trump is “fake news.”  Keep believing that Trump is not a politician and that he wants to “Make America Great Again.”

You are all fools.  Trump only cares about himself and making his brand and his family more wealthy.  One day, this is what the history books will say.

Cheers, China and now Russia wins again.

 

 

 

 

 

jude tries outlaw poetry

A hipster dabbles in Outlaw Poetry and it’s exactly what you would expect from a hipster

HipsterStories

Hipster-Clubs-Big-Chillbeing this cool (bar night)

scrappy beard, shifting in the winter wind like an old cowboy riding a trail

neck…..protected by black/white polka dotted scarf, found at garage sale where a father passed away, $1

bar on the corner, walked into it with head high

“I’ll take your oddest, most original IPA,” I said to the bat tender.

Several sips later, the air begins to thicken and my thoughts drift,

Book ideas and screenplays play a dangerous game of “who gets published first” inside my head, my head that props up a ridiculously suave, purple fedora.

Others in the bar cast jealous stares in my direction.

They wish they could be this hip, this cool, this in touch with the lost elegance of the cultures that danced before me.

Typical night out, success

Tomorrow, a search for patchouli shampoo…………….

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