It’s about 10 at night and McDonald’s starts rolling out their visually delicious Egg McMuffin commercials as you sit on the couch with one hand scratching your balls and the other hand holding the remote.
You change the channel because your attention span is that of a 3 year-old and you need to find something to watch between commercials of the inane reality show you were watching.
The next channel is Taco Bell enticing you with another visually delicious picture of a taco wrapped with a Dorito shell.
Holy Shit, what to do now?
One– you can turn the television off and go to bed.
Or, Two– you can drive your lazy ass to Taco Bell and buy four of those tasty tacos, remember they are open LATE.
Or, Three- you can waddle your fat ass over the refrigerator, stick your head in and peruse the shelves for something to eat. Three is the best bet, because you don’t have to leave the house and you can always get that McDonalds breakfast when you wake up.
After eating some more fat, sodium and calories, you go to bed and wonder why you can’t stop belching and wonder why your chest hurts. It’s ok, just roll over on your side and fart yourself to sleep.
Hey FAT BOY, did you realize that you are a target market?
Don’t try to argue, you are the reason why those commercials exist, you are the reason health care costs are skyrocketing, you are the reason why the next commercial to entice you is discounted medical supplies for diabetics. Because you are going to need insulin, FAT BOY.
And stop dreaming, sorry, but you are never going to marry Paula Dean, she’s taken.
But don’t worry, I’m sure there is a lawyer out there who will gladly take on your lawsuit against fast food companies for making you obese. It’s their fault you can’t stop shoveling shit in your mouth.
DUH’America- We have all become a target market and can’t get enough of it. Again, this is why China will win.