The Homeless Need to Work for My Money

I’m tired of homeless people begging me for money who don’t look homeless.  I feel very sympathetic to homeless people, I do have a heart.

But, if one is going to beg me for money, they better at least look homeless or at least have a damn funny sign.

I will not give money to homeless people if they:

  • are wearing Nike Air shoes or shoes with no holes in them
  • have new hats
  • have clean finger nails or well manicured facial hair
  • have a more expensive jacket than I have
  • aren’t missing teeth
  • have pets of any kind, (if they can afford to feed a dog, they don’t need my money)
  • claim to be “clean” from drugs/alcohol (they are homeless, they should want to be high and drunk, that’s ok

You may think I’m sadistic, but I want the homeless to work for my money.  I want them to dance a little, sing a song, rap a bit.  I’m tired of the lazy homeless.  It’s time for the homeless to step it up a notch if they want my money.  Is that too much to ask?

When I was in New York years ago, a homeless guy had a sign that said, “Please contribute to my Pastrami sandwich fund.”  I gave him money, that was creative.  I just want a little creativity or a little honesty.  When I do give money to the homeless, I always tell them they should buy some liquor or drugs with it.  Why not?  They are fucking homeless, they should get fucked up as often as possible.

Am I alone here????

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