Blame yourself. Why? Because it all starts with you.
You may wake up one day to find that China has won. Then our street vendors will be serving fried golden retriever nuggets and we will be getting to work via rickshaws, do not piss your pants. We deserve it.
Here are some recent headlines from TMZ.com:
Bobbi Kristina- Friends were shocked to hear she was dating her “brother.”
Mike Tyson- First Las Vegas, Then BROADWAY!!!!
Kim K and Kris Humphries- Annulment is the Sticking Point
JWoww & Snooki- Please Don’t Feed the Animals
You may be wondering why those above headlines matter. They matter because millions of Americans care about the life of two drug addicted former music stars, a washed up rapist athlete, a chick with a big ass who made a sex tape and two girls who get drunk, fight on camera and pretend to represent the state of New Jersey.
Shame on you America, shame on you for creating the demand that keeps this mindless drivel relevant.
Shame on you for implanting your ass on the couch to watch American Idol and only getting up to find your cell phone so you can follow Ryan Seacrest’s instructions to vote.
Shame on you America for thinking that Rosie O’Donnell is humorous, for thinking Oprah is a real journalist and for thinking that The Bachelor is true love.
Shame on you America for believing that politicians give a shit about anyone but themselves, for thinking war is necessary and for thinking that the Bible is real.
DUH’America, I don’t love what you have become. That’s why I write and that’s why I still read books that require me to physically turn the pages.